Archive for the Simple Category

I Don’t Even Game

Posted in 4 stars, Puzzle, Random, Simple with tags , , , on March 29, 2010 by Hol Lucia

How? No how, just do! Avoid spikeys, xamine cloos, think hard, and keeping to go, plz!

I’m not going to give away the secrets to this one, see how far you can get before the game out smarts you. I got to level 67.

~play it here:


Robot Unicorn Attack

Posted in 5 stars, Games, Platform, Simple with tags , , , , , , on March 1, 2010 by Ortus

Robot Unicorn Attack has had nearly 2,000,000 plays since Adult Swim put the game up a few days ago on their website. It has gone massively viral part in thanks to the support of one of the internet’s most notoriously hostile websites, where for one day differences were put aside and the constant bickering ceased to allow them to play this game and be in harmony.

WARNING: may result in unexpected tears of joy.

The typical user reaction to stumbling across Robot Unicorn Attack.

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Posted in 3 stars, Games, Puzzle, Simple with tags , , , on January 12, 2009 by sarcolepsy

I’m not dead, just lazy. I’ve been playing games and not telling you about them. Sorry. I figured it was about time I brought you at the very least a short lazy review of a short simple game. So here we have Cursor*10, a short, simple game.

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Irritating Games

Posted in 4 stars, Games, Physics, Puzzle, Simple with tags , , , , , , , , , , on November 25, 2008 by Ortus

I’m going to kinda take a leaf out of BigPoppaCreamy’s book here, and instead of bringing you just one review, this will be a compendium of sorts. This is a site review rather than a review of an individual game. The site calls itself ‘Irritating Games’, so on that basis I am going to eschew the traditional 5 star rating system, and instead rate each game on a Rage Scale.


First up is Double Jeu

The premise of this game is straightforward. You have an Arkanoid stylee paddle, a tilting ledge thing, and two balls. Lose a ball and you’re dead. Keep it going as long as possible.

Easy, right?


Moving the paddle moves the ledge. Moving the ledge moves the paddle. So a sharp movement of the mouse sends the ball on the ledge careering towards oblivion. A minor correction on the ledge means you’re gonna miss the accelerating bouncing ball and get killed dead.

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How To Make Pumpkin Pan Cake

Posted in 0.5 stars, Games, Simple with tags , , , , on November 11, 2008 by sarcolepsy

It came time to review another game, and I didn’t know what I should look at next. A cunning plan came to mind. In order to find something you haven’t all already played I’d use Google to find something that’s not already popular. I usually never leave the first page of results as what I’m looking for is almost always within the top few hits. So this time I’d venture into the second page of results and pick the second result found there.

So I needed a noun to put alongside the quoted string “flash game”. I’m uncertain how I came to choose the noun ‘cake’ but that’s what I did. Page two, link two of ‘cake “flash game”‘ led me to the “How To Make Pumpkin Pan Cake” game.
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Posted in 4 stars, Puzzle, Simple with tags , , , on October 19, 2008 by Ortus

So, introduction time …

I’m Tom and whilst the reviews I bring are unlikely to concentrate on one particular field of flash games, I’ve been playing for a good number of years now and I figure that if you stick with me I’ll see you right, more or less. I’ll try to cut through the bullshit and tell you how it is (as, no doubt, will my fellow reviewers) to save you some of the time that you are probably already spending hunting out games, given that you ended up here … somehow.

Compared with those games that my flashist comrades have either chosen or been coerced into looking at in this opening round of reviews you may think that I have taken the easy option with Boomshine, a favourite little casual puzzler of mine. And you’d be quite right in that assumption. Rest assured I will be delving into parts unknown in the future, but for now I couldn’t resist the temptation of the opportunity to come back to Boomshine yet again for a quick fix and write a few words about it.

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